LizaWasHere

Who Am I, And Why Am I Here?

Are you looking for my post about the genotyping company,23andMe, which announced a cool new community for pregnant/ttc women on Good Morning America yesterday? It moved! That post now lives on my new review blog: Things I Like!

Seven Months

Dear Josie, Tomorrow, you will be 7 months old. Your biggest change this month was a HUGE one -- you've started sitting up independently. And you LOVE it. You want to sit up and look at everything. There are only 2 times that you don't want to be sitting: First, when you first see me after some time of being apart -- then you greet me like I'm a rock star, and demand to be picked up so we can kiss all over each other. And second, when you've been sitting for a long time and you want a break to lie on your back and kick your legs like a soccer star. You are also experiementing with the noises you can make -- babbles, giggles, singing, growling, cooing, and word-like sounds such as "hi." This month, we've started trying to feed you solid food. So far, you're just not that interested. You liked carrots, and put up with rice cereal, mixed fruit, and peas. Applesauce, pears, and sweet potatoes might as well be poison as far as you're concerned. What you really want are glasses of pretty yellow apple juice. Or beer. What you haven't done well this month, is sleep. I think you wake up between every sleep cycle, and you have a really hard time soothing yourself back to sleep. You and I have been up together 3 and 4 times per night most nights the last few weeks, and sometimes you've even gotten This Mommy up too. When you get over this nasty cold you've had for the last week, we are going to have to start you on some kind of sleeping boot camp, where you will learn how to soothe yourself back to sleep in the night. We love you, but the sleep deprivation is making your Mommies crazy. Josie, you are a sweet, engaging, loving, adorable baby girl. Your whole face lights up when Noah comes over to talk to you or give you a toy or a hug and kiss. You give me and This Mommy the same treatment when we've been apart for a couple of hours. And it melts our hearts and lifts our spirits like nothing else. Thank you for being our baby girl. We couldn't have asked for a more wonderful newest member of our family. love, That Mommy

How Did it Get to be Friday?

Seriously. How did it get to be Friday? I've been working on a ton of exciting stuff this week. Unfortunately, most of it doesn't actually pay. And I can't talk about the part that does until next week. Having said that, I hope to be making lots of exciting announcements here next week. No actual job announcements, but at least interesting ways that I will be using my brain while I continue looking for that elusive day job. This week was also about meltdowns. I had a big fat one on Tuesday. I think it was Tuesday. It might have been Wednesday. I'm having a really hard time with unemployment. I hate it. It makes me feel like a failure. I really thought I would have found a job by now. Also, even though I'm not at home with the kids full time -- Noah is in preschool 8:30 - 3 every day, and Josie is in day care all day 3x/week -- I don't think I'm great at the SAHM gig. I can handle either of them pretty well, but not both. Anyway. Wish me luck, and watch this space for exciting announcements early next week.

Happy Ada Lovelace Day

Happy Ada Lovelace Day! Ada Lovelace is considered to be one of the first computer programmers, ever, in history. Ada Lovelace Day is a day to celebrate women in technology. I signed a pledge, along with hundreds of other writers, to write about a woman in technology whom I admire. Back when I was a Washington DC technology lobbyist, I thought a lot about women and people of color in technology. In fact, one of the ways I would fill the occasional dull moment in a large meeting was to make a little tally in the margin of my paper, noting how many women vs men there were in the room. Same with people of color vs whites. (At least by my best guess.) Those numbers were almost always heavily skewed towards white men. Not that there's anything wrong with those guys -- but they tended to dominate the room. So here are some of my unsung heros among women in technology. I'm grateful that you were in those rooms and other similarly skewed rooms, and that you helped to create room for me and for all of us. Thank you. Deirdre Mulligan: Mulligan is the Director of the Samuelson Law, Technology & Public Policy Clinic and a clinical professor of law at the UC Berkeley School of Law (Boalt Hall). Before going to Boalt, she was staff counsel at the Center for Democracy & Technology in Washington. Through the clinic, Mulligan and her students foster the public's interest in new computer and communication technology by engaging in client advocacy and interdisciplinary research, and by participating in developing technical standards and protocols. The clinic's work has advanced and protected the public's interest in free expression, individual privacy, balanced intellectual property rules, and secure, reliable, open communication networks. Mulligan is also an alumna of Smith College, my own alma mater, and we're very proud to claim her. Paula Bruening: Bruening is Deputy Executive Director of The Centre for Information Policy Leadership at Hunton & Williams LLP, a path-finding global privacy and information security think tank located in Washington, D.C. Bruening currently focuses on cross border data flows, emerging technologies, government use of private sector data and cybersecurity issues. Previously, Bruening worked with the US government on evolving privacy policy and directed compliance at TRUSTe, the online privacy seal program, and as a Senior Attorney-Advisor for the Office of Chief Counsel, National Telecommunications and Information Administration, US Department of Commerce. Leslie Harris: Harris is the President and CEO of the Center for Democracy & Technology. She has over two decades of experience as a civil liberties, technology and Internet lawyer, public policy advocate and strategist in Washington. She testifies before Congress, writes, and speaks on issues related to technology, the Internet, and civil liberties. Ms. Harris played a lead role in shaping Internet legislation, including the E-rate program, which brought the power of the Internet to rural and inner city classrooms and public libraries, the Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (“COPPA”) which mandated a privacy regime for children’s personal information on the Internet and the Technology Education and Copyright Harmonization Act, (TEACH) which amended copyright law to support the development of online learning. She was also a key strategist and spokesperson in the effort to defeat the Communications Decency Act. Cassandra Butts: Deputy White House Counsel with a Focus on Domestic Policy and Ethics. I met Ms. Butts when she worked for then-Minority Leader Rep. Richard Gephardt. She was responsible for, among other things, technology policy and appointments. We worked closely together when Commissioners were being named to the Children's Online Protection Act Commission. While she obviously works on far more than merely technology issues, I have no doubt that her experience in technology policy plays a role in how the Obama Administration will move technology policy forward. Librarians and Library Advocates: Librarianship remains a profession dominated by women, and is also one of the most technologically thoughtful and advanced professions out there. I admire so many awesome librarians that I can't link to all of them, but will name and link to just a few.

• Emily Sheketoff, Lynne Bradley, and the rest of the ALA Washington Office.
• Judith Krug, Director of the ALA Office for Intellectual Freedom
• Helen R. Adams, former President of the American Association of School Librarians, and author of Ensuring Intellectual Freedom and Access to Information in the School Library Media Program, and co-author with me of Privacy In The 21st Century: Issues for Public, School, and Academic Libraries.
• Jessamyn West, privacy and intellectual freedom advocate and the author of Revolting Librarians Redux.
• Laura Quilter, librarian, lawyer, and information activist, blogging about information law and policy, science, the environment, atheism and religion, feminism and oppression, authority and autonomy. And occasionally tea or cats or science fiction.

There are more. But I am out of time for blogging. Thanks to all of you for being amazing women in technology, women helping technology policy to develop in productive directions, and women whom I like and admire. Happy Ada Lovelace Day to all of you, especially.

Thanks, Mr. M!

This morning, I had one of the most interesting and fun mornings that I can remember. I spent it with a friend of mine, Mr. M., who teaches writing to 5th and 6th graders at a local area elementary school. Mr. M. asked me to come in and talk with his classes about blogging. Mr. M. and I are creating a closed for-the-class-only blog that he and his students will use to write for and to one another. (COPPA concerned educators and lawyers, do not fret. The kids will get parental permission before they can write, and all of the blog administrivia will be handled by adults. Furthermore, Internet safety is part of the pre-blogging instruction and will continue to be part of the ongoing discussion both online and in Mr. M's classroom. Also, real life friends, please don't include anything in the comments that would identify Mr. M or the school where he teaches.) Can I just say that the kids were awesome? I had just under an hour with each group of students, and in every case, we ran out of time answering their questions. Usually we had to wrap things up with 4 or 5 hands still in the air. Most of the questions were intelligent, thoughtful, and sometimes even thought-provoking. You should be seriously jealous that I will get to read what they write, but you won't. Because their blog will be limited to the 3 writing classes that are involved, plus parents and school administrators. Maybe we'll be able to work something out where I can publish excerpts of some of their work here, so that you can see what interesting writers these young people are -- and I am sure that they are. In addition to enjoying meeting and talking to these young people, I liked the questions they asked that made me think about my own life and my blog. One student asked me why I like blogging. What a great question. I like blogging for two reasons: First, I love having a place to vent and share news and just express myself. But second, and more importantly, I love blogging because of you, the people who read my blog. I love the community/ies that we've created, the sense of connectedness, and the fact that I've made great friends here in the blogosphere, some of whom I may never meet in real life. (I'm not linking to examples because I know I would forget some of you and I would feel awful about it. Trust me, I probably do mean you.) Several students asked questions about why I started blogging, and how I decided what to write about on my blog. It was fun to think about how that evolved. When I first started, I wasn't sure how I was going to maintain the discipline necessary to write frequently on the same topic. Near the same time, I saw Jessamyn's list of how many books she read the previous year, including a breakdown of fiction/non-fiction, liked/disliked, male/female authors. I was totally inspired by her list, and determined to create one of my own. As I told the students, I thought I was going to write a "book review blog" only it turned out that I'm not that interested in reading book reviews. I didn't enjoy commenting on book review blogs. I love books, and I like writing book reviews, but I only like talking with people about books they like, not reading about what books some random voice on the Internet says. So that didn't work out. Instead, I got pregnant, and suddenly needed to read the blogs of everyone I could find who was also pregnant (or TTC or adopting) (that's Trying To Conceive, if any of Mr. M.'s students are reading this). THOSE were the blogs I wanted to read, to comment on, and to have come read here. It was fun to remember those days, to re-read some of those posts, and to catch up on some of the blogs I no longer read daily. (I miss you!) So thanks, Mr. M. I had a great time this morning, and I look forward to working on this project with you and your student writers!

Bad Guys, Computers, and Kids: A Story By Noah

Mommy! Three bad guys broke a computer and and and some kids bonked them and the bad guys ran away and said sorry. And then five bad guys broke a computer and two kids tried to bonk them but they were scared. And more kids kicked the bad guys and the 'puter was ok.

This is the story Noah told me on the way to work. I think it has to do with the conversation he heard me have with my aunt, after my cousin's facebook page was hacked. Also his current obsession with bad guys. I'd rather tell you that story than the one about the cable trouble caused by the TWC tech who came over today, leading to another one coming tomorrow. That will be the 6th one in 7 weeks. For the house where we've lived for less than 4 months.

New Book: Mothering and Blogging

I wrote a chapter for a book that's THISCLOSE to going to press!

And that there link will take you to the page where you can still pre-order it for a 20% discount! (Big thanks to Tracy for making the readable icon! Tracy also makes fun, hip tickers that you should check out if you like that sort of thing.) My chapter is all about the creation of LesbianFamily.org, and there are a bunch of other amazing women who contributed to the book. So if you enjoy reading blogs by and about Moms, you should buy this one. (I don't get a single cent for it, only bragging rights.)

Milestone #1 (Mine, Not Josie's)

What is the opposite of a gym rat? Whatever it it is, I'm that. I used to be so uncomfortable that I could barely even force myself to go without massive stress and fear, even tears sometimes. I apparently look vaguely athletic, but psychologically, I'm the kid who was afraid of the ball and always got picked last for any team sport. Having actually gone to a hospital gym in Atlanta, and now to the Y a few times, I no longer feel like the dorky ignorant kid among the cool kids. Indeed, both places were far more densely populated by women old enough to be my grandmother than by anyone whom I could classify as a cool kid. Three weeks ago, I signed us up for a family membership at the Y. Because even though I am not a fan of the gym, I am a fan of good health and longevity, and of being a good example for Noah and Josie. Also, I want to fit back into my professional looking clothes. Because I do believe I will get a job one of these days. For the last 2 weeks, I went swimming every other day for 20 minutes. Every time I got out of the water, I felt like all of the muscles in my entire body were made from melted butter. Today, I was surprised to see that the 20 minutes were up! And when I got out of the water, I didn't feel like I was made from melted butter! Woot! My plan is to stick with the 20 minutes, 3x/week, through the end of March. Then I plan to increase to 25 minutes, and in April, I plan to increase it again to 30 minutes. I have no plans further out than April. We'll see. I need your help. My usual fitness program retention rate is about 6 weeks. Would you mind holding me to account in April and May? Thanks!

The Sleep Deprivation Is Officially Killing Me

When Noah was a baby, I hit the sleep deprivation wall around 10 months. But since we now know that having more than one child is logarithmically more difficult than having just 1, I've hit that wall a lot sooner. So far, Josie has slept through the night twice, I think. I only remember the most recent one, which was mercifully the night before my last job interview. At the moment, the poor girl has a rough cold and cough. I know that's why she has been sleeping so poorly, but that doesn't make me any less bleary and exhausted. We also know that her crying doesn't wake up Noah, or at least it hasn't so far. Some middle of the nights I'm faster at getting up and going to her than other middle of the nights. So. When this cold is better and she is breathing well, sleep training begins. With Noah, when we hit that wall, we did some sort of modified ferberizing. And it worked pretty well, over the course of less than a week. Please God, let us have similar results with Josie.

Bad Week for Blogging

It's been a bad week for blogging, at least so far, although not a bad week in general. Monday was pretty productive, although I ended up having a very nice, unplanned, and long lunch with my Aunt. Which ate into blogging time. Yesterday I was on the road all day, for an interview. The job would be awesome, but the location bites. If I get it, hopefully they'll let me work from home or from their Milwaukee office 3 days/week. Today started off well, but deterioriated quickly. Too much time at home in the morning, and then the cafe Internet access was slow and cranky, so nothing major done in the afternoon. The upside of the whole week so far is that we joined a gym, and I am swimming again! I'm on track to do a full mile this week. My plan is to keep the pace easy and low key for now. I'm doing 20 minutes each time, and 3 of the 4 times I made the full 1/3 mile. I want to up to 45 minutes, but slowly, adding ~5 minutes per month.